If you want your child to thrive in a world filled with distraction, comparison, and emotional overload, give them the gift of grit. And ask the world’s expert on it for advice, in person. Angela Duckworth, the world’s leading researcher on grit, has spent her career proving that the ability to persevere through difficulty is the single greatest predictor of long‑term success. Her TED Talk has been viewed more than 38 million times, a small chunk of which was certainly Action Karate instructors and families over the last 14 years.

That’s why the University of Pennsylvania Professor’s recent public conversation with former American Surgeon General Dr. Vivek Murthy was an unmissable opportunity for Action instructors to ask her a question:

Her answer was simple, powerful, and immediately actionable:

This is gold for parents. Kids don’t need lectures. They need recognition of effort. Your words, actions and social media posts need to highlight the positive moments.

When, Where, and Why Do We Build Grit?

When do you build grit? After a kid complains, fails or asks to quit. (In other words: Now)

Where? A great place is on the karate mat. Kids learn to struggle, keep trying and seek support– —surrounded by instructors who believe in them and a community that reinforces the values Murthy and Duckworth say we need most.

Why? Grit isn’t born. It’s trained. It’s the secret common ingredient she found in successful 7th graders, teachers, West Point cadets, salespeople and CEOs. And for our part, it’s the one thing all Black Belts have.

How do we instill grit? To answer that, let’s zoom out—because the world our kids are growing up in is not the world we grew up in. And that’s where Dr. Vivek Murthy, former U.S. Surgeon General, enters the conversation.

The World Is Getting Harder—And Kids Are Feeling It

At a live event featuring Angela Duckworth and Vivek Murthy in Philadelphia, Murthy talked about traveling from city to city and seeing the same pattern: “Forces are chipping away at the core elements that make us human—our ability to build relationships, to see someone struggling, to show up and help.”

He warned that:

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  Social media platforms amplify emotional content because rage and outrage keep people online.
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  AI and technology accelerate the speed at which harmful content spreads.
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  Kids are growing up in a culture where worth is tied to wealth, beauty, status, followers.

Angela Duckworth added that age 53 is statistically the least happy age—caught between aging parents, big‑kid problems, and ambitions not yet achieved. But teenagers today are reporting lower happiness than teens in the 70s and 80s, even though they have more comfort, more access, and more technology.

The numbers are staggering:

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  40% of kids ages 8–12 are on social media, despite age restrictions.
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  Kids spend 4.8 hours a day on social platforms.
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  Two‑thirds of kids sleep with their phones.
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  Three‑quarters of parents do too.
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  95 percent of teenagers have a phone, regardless of economic status.

Murthy emphasized that the benefits of social media do not outweigh the risks, especially for kids ages 11–14, whose brains are in a stage of development where impulse control is low and social comparison is high.

Behind all of this, Murthy said, is a quieter crisis: Parents are lonelier than ever. 79% of single parents report struggling with loneliness and stress.

So what does this have to do with grit? Everything.

How Grit Grows in a Community

Angela Duckworth: “Grit is passion and perseverance for long‑term goals.” Duckworth’s research shows that grit grows when kids do hard things, fail and try again, work toward long‑term goals, belong to a community that expects effort, and see adults model perseverance. That’s a familiar concept to martial arts.

In her TED Talk, Duckworth says: “Grit is living life like it’s a marathon, not a sprint.” And: “The best way to build grit in kids is to model it.”

This is why martial arts is uniquely powerful. It gives kids a structured, supportive environment where effort is praised, setbacks are normal, and progress is earned—not given. Parents get the same experience in adult class – social support, work toward goals, constant challenges. If there is one word that defines what martial arts gives children—and what the world desperately needs right now—it’s grit. Not talent. Not luck. Not perfect circumstances.

When your child tries a new kick, practices without being asked, shows respect, pushes through a tough class, helps a younger student, fails a belt test, then passes, or overcomes boredom, distraction, difficulty:

• Point it out.

  Name it.

• Post it.

  Celebrate it.

That’s how grit grows in a community. This is exactly what martial arts does. It gives kids a place where screens are not allowed (a standard politicians are now trying to implement in schools), kids build confidence, connect with peers, smile, get stronger and learn.

Why Grit Matters More Than Ever

Duckworth’s research shows that grit predicts success more than talent, IQ, or circumstances. Murthy’s warnings show that the world is full of distractions that can erode grit. Martial arts gives kids:

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  A long‑term goal (black belt)
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  A community that reinforces effort
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  A safe place to fail and succeed
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  A structure that builds discipline
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  A culture that celebrates perseverance

And it gives parents a roadmap: Look for the bright spots. Name the effort. Celebrate the grit.